I thought...

Wow. I knew it wouldn't be easy to see the pictures. It was hard enough finding out he was in love with her. And then to see the pictures. To see how happy she made him. To actually SEE it. What a huge slap in the face.

Beth gave me a writing prompt today. This is what came from it.

I thought I could handle this.

I thought it would be easier to be friends.

I thought this wouldn’t hurt so much.

I knew you loved her.

I knew it would end.

I knew she had your heart.

But I thought I could be with you.

I thought I could prove how much I loved you.

I thought I could make you love me.

I wish I was stronger.

I wish I could tell you all my inner thoughts.

I wish i could be with you.

I thought it was me.

I thought I did something wrong.

I thought I wasn’t good enough.

I know I didn’t.

I know it wasn’t me.

I know I loved you the best I could.

I want to be with you.

I want to feel your love again.

I want to hear your voice again.

I want to feel your touch again.

I want to taste your lips again.

I know that I can’t.

I know I never will.

I know I need to move on.

I don’t think that I can.

I don’t think I am strong enough.

I don’t know how to carry on.

I thought we had no secrets.

I thought we shared together.

I thought we were honest with eachother.

I want to know the truth.

I want you to tell me everything.

I want you to be honest...completely.

I don’t want to hurt anymore.

I don’t want to cry anymore.

I don’t want to love you anymore.

I thought I was moving on.

I thought I was getting better.

I thought I would be ok.

I’m not.

I don't even know how to talk to him anymore. How to talk to anyone. I wish this was all over with. I wish I could turn these feelings off. Just when I think I'm ok, it all comes crashing down again. I wish i knew how to deal...